Friday, October 31, 2008

LOA IS HERE

Ok...for those of you who know what I am talking about - OUR LOA CAME TODAY!!! Whoo hooo!!! (Letter of Acceptance!!)

Travel in as little as 5 week! OMG...this is the best Halloween EVER!!!!!!! Whoo hoooo!!!! Josh, buddy - HERE WE COME!!!! :)

Top 10 most notable reactions to our adoption story.

Let me start by saying this: I have always had pride in my ability to value difference in people. You don’t have to think, look, feel or be “like” me in order for me to “love” you! One of the things I enjoy most in this world is the way people are all different and interesting. I love other people’s points of view. I love the see and hear about other people’s jobs, families, hobbies and life choices. Difference is what makes this world such a wonderful place to be in! I don’t scrap book, nor will I ever have the patience for such a thing. But I’ll sit and look and hugely appreciate other peoples scrap books for hours!


Now have you ever had a thought – which you know you are entitled to have, but you know that it should probably stay in your own head? I have – OFTEN! That is why every person – at one time or another finds it necessary to FILTER what comes out of their mouth. We are adults… and it is not always acceptable to speak our minds. I don’t see this as taking away the right to free speech. I see it as an issue of respect for others feelings. So in short – I believe we have a right to think whatever we want! …but we don’t need to say it!!


So we are adopting little Joshua Song. We have known about “our child” for three years now. Known that they were out there, known that they would someday be in our arms. And now…finally – we have a face to go with our dreams! A perfect time in the lives of the Mongold family! We have had such support from our friends and family, that it completely fills my heart!

But I’ll tell ya – in the name of a good laugh, I HAVE to share with you all some of the comments that I have received when people find out we are adopting a little man from China. And all of those words play here. Adopting, Man and China…..Amazing how there are some people without this necessary filter!


Please take this for the humor that I mean it to show! No one that reads my blog has ever said anything to fit into the "not so filtered" comments that I am about to write! I have no bitter feelings…more just feelings of Awe…as I hear the words that come from people’s mouths. And truly, some of these are too darn good to have in my head only….i need for my friends and family to share in the craziness! So here they are….both the good and the bad…the top 10 best comments that I have received when people find out about Joshua Song!!






The top ten most notable reactions to the adoption of our son:



10



When I have told several people about our Chinese Adoption – their reaction – without hesitation – is to tell me a horror story about a child that they know -who was adopted – and who has not done well in this world. A negative story about an experience that is much less than wonderful in their eyes? And to this I ask - Why? When person is pregnant to you tell them about the kid with ADHD, or the kid that was born with a terrible birth defect? No….people never do that? So why do I get so lucky!?!


9



When people here we are adopting a boy they say, “Are you sure you want a boy?” or “Are you disappointed that you are getting a boy?”– And to that I say - Have no doubt - WE have waited three years, and had 1100 days of waiting and anticipating to think this through, spent THOUSANDS of dollars, and will travel ½ way around the world to get him– WE ARE SURE! Whoo hooo!!!!!

8


Are you sad that you will never have a little girl? People ask me this – MANY people. And I want to say to them….Are you sad that you will never know what life would have been like with 4 little men? Of course I don’t say that out loud…only in my head! And well…now on my blog! What the heck would make someone ask that? If I had a biological boy that I had no control over – would you ask me then – or would you just feel sorry for me silently? If it is the latter – apply that now!

7


“You realize…”, people will say, that “there is a chance that this child will never be “normal”! Well…thanks for that blanket of light people…I realize much more than I must let on. I realize that every person born of this world has so many possibilities for how their life will play out. Biological kids, adopted kids, only kids, girl kids, boy kids, oldest kids, youngest kids, etc. etc. I love my children – all 4 of them – and I will do my very very best to give them ALL the best that life as to offer. And if anything short of perfect befalls them….I love them no less and I will try no less hard. That is my promise to my family….and some days I feel like I need to get on National TV and promise it to all the people who don't know me!!

6



Did you even think about adopting a child here in the US? “They need homes too.” – well…to this I say again….I am truly an educated person. A well researched person, and someone that DOES know all of her options. But thank you for making sure! And if you were going to help me in making my “where” adoption decision…you should have mentioned that three years ago!! ha ha ha



In the world that I live in – all God’s Children are equal: Each important, each necessary, and each a blessing… no matter what the country they are born in or the color of their skin. One child – our child – will have a privileged life, and life of true love of family and of a mother and a father! I am at peace with that. I can’t see that it matters where the child was born. My prayers don’t go out to US orphans…but to all orphans. I pray that each one of Gods children has a chance to be great in this short and sweet life.



5


“How lucky this little boy is that you are saving him!” Now I appreciate the sentiment in this comment and it is one that I get very often. But I feel I need to address it – not because it amazes me or anything , but I feel it shows that I am not fully understood. - Make no mistake about it. We are the lucky ones. There is a plan for each person in this life – or at least I believe that to be true in many ways. My paths lead me to 4 children. How they come to be in my life is no matter. We were given 4 children to raise and love and set forth into the world. That is my calling and Steve’s calling! We are the lucky ones, and I am just blessed that there was a way to find our third child beyond my own body, since my own body is not as able as it used to be to bear children!

4



“Are you aware the special needs children often have more wrong with them than you can know at first?” The answer is simple – YES. I know this. I am thankful for the concern of friends and family and I realize that many of the people who ask this are looking out for my best interest. But the simple answer is Yes – I know this. We chose this. We love our son. He will have the same love and support as any of us do in this family! And we will conquer any odds!



3


I often get the comment – and mostly from people who I don’t know “as well” (being new to this areas there are a lot of those) , “Good for you – I just don’t think I could adopt.” Yep…more than 10 times I have heard this come out of people mouths. So what are you saying to me? I would not do it because it is too hard, too expensive, I don’t know if I could love a child that is not my own, too many risks? All valid reasons...but I am never sure what a person means. And it seems too personal to just ask them... so I refrain from commenting back. I just say (in an awkward voice)“Oh…we are really excited!” And then there is that moment of silence that seems like a million years...and the subject gets changed!

2


Another comment that I welcome – and get more often than you might expect is “ Wow…that is cool – how did you get into this process and what agency did you use?” First of all, hearing this makes me think – wow…in all this craziness…other people not only accept what we are doing, but their initial reaction is….how do I get onto this wonderful path. That is exciting to me! I am not an adoption pusher. I never really think that others should “do as I do”. What that comment really says is – great idea. One I could also entertain. Not that the person will EVER go down that road…but they are telling me that it is a road that is appealing to them as well and God Speed on it. I respect that. And it warms my heart!



1


The comment that I have love loved the most is:, “FINALLY – You have been waiting so long!!! WE are so happy for you!” And this…is the comment…that I truly do get MOST often. It feels good to hear that people know we have been waiting. And when the excitement in their voice conveys their love for us and their appreciation of our wait – it makes my heart full. To know that our dear friends and family have been waiting “with us” and praying “with us” means more to me than I could ever express in words. And for those of you who have shared in our wait with us – we can’t wait to share our son with you! Truly – we can’t wait!!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

We wait together

So we wait? Aghhh...waiting is life's hardest path isn't it? Not knowing when....or how it will go...or if I am prepared....amazing how a wait for something so important can make you second guess every part of your being!! :) My head might be crazy...but my heart remains focused and strong! NO MATTER what this path holds for us....I know in my heart it is the right one!

I read stories about good Chinese Adoption experiences and they warm my heart. And I read stories that are not so positive, and that keeps my balance and my reality in check!

So what do we do while we wait for Joshua Song....we NEST, send packages, buy him toys for under the tree, and talk about him each and every day! The kids are so excited that they will tell anyone that will listen! And Will says "Josh -U- a is coming to sleep with me...and he is CHUTE!" (LOVE THAT WILL AND HIS WILL LANGUAGE!!! :)

We have sent two care packages to the orphanage to date, and a third one is on the way. In this one, I have included a story to little Josh that can be read to him by his Nannies! it will contain the following pics, and under each photo will be an English part and a translated Mandarin part. (I'll spare you the Mandarin...but suffice it to say...it will be written above the English version on each page!) This way, we can continue to read it to him in English when he is with us! It will help him to understand that just because it sounds different or looks different does not mean that it is!!


A forever family for Song

Once upon a time there was a little boy named Song! He was a happy boy, with a beautiful heart and a handsome face! He lived in China with his wonderful nannies. And he was very much loved!




A mommy and Daddy and three bothers’ in the United States found out that Song needed a family to call his own. It was so perfect because this family longed for another little boy to love!


Mommy and Daddy worked hard to get all the work done so that Song could come and live with them forever.

Mommy and Daddy made Song a wonderful Bedroom. And Brother Will is very excited to have a special little brother to sleep with him every night.


Ben and Kyle helped mommy and daddy pick out lots of toys for Song to play with.


The Mongold family could not wait to have their little boy home with them so they could play with him, hug him, and love him with all of their hearts!


One day, Mommy was finally able to come to China to see her little boy for the first time. She held him and hugged him and cried tears of joy each time that she looked into his eyes.

After a couple of weeks in China, Song was able to get on a big airplane and fly across the oceans to meet his Daddy and his brothers!

Song lived a perfect life with his new family and it was always clear that he was meant to be with them. He made their life complete and gave his family so much joy.




Song grew to love his three brothers and the four boys were best friends for all of time! And Song loved his mommy and daddy – and they loved him – with a love that was bigger than the mountains and reached farther than the sun!


We will see you soon little man! We love you so much!


Your forever family,
Mommy, Daddy, Ben (age 6), Kyle (age 5) and Will (age 3)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

We are coming little man!!!



On September 22, 2008 - just one day before Kyle's birthday - we got our "Call"! The call that we have waited for 3 years to answer!


It was the most amazing moment! I assumed when I saw the caller ID, that we were going to need to do additional paperwork because of our recent move. We had been working hard for about 3 months to get everything up to date and changed to the state of Florida. A whirlwind of paperwork that assured us when our call came...we would be ready for it!


And so we were - ready that is....!! "Renee, we have a match for you!", Pam Said, "And I'll tell ya - cute isn't the most important thing...but this little dear is DARN CUTE!"


As she was telling me the details of little Song, I was making a mad dash for my computer where his pictures were waiting in my in box! It took me about 1 second to fall in love with our little man and in that same instant - I knew he was meant to be our son!


Song is 19 months old and he resides in a social welfare institution in the city of Xinyang, in the province of Henan. Song is assumed to have been born full term and is now in the normal range for size and abilities. He speaks words (not in english of course) blows kisses, plays with toys and seems to be a wonderful little guy! He is said to be shy with strangers. But will talk to them if he is in his nanny's arms!


We don't know all that much about him, but we do have doctors reports and these three photos, and it seems that is all the Mongold family needed to welcome our baby into our hearts! Ben told his teacher and the kids at school before I had a chance to tell them, and they wondered if he was making it up! ha ha ha....they must not know Ben that well yet...the kid DOES NOT lie!! :)


We have been waiting for 4 weeks for a form from China (PA) that makes this all official. Yes, we were already approved by the Chinese government, but you have to be approved for the "specific child" once you accept them. So I have been dying to share this news and am so happy that we can finally do that!


We have at least a month wait now for another set of papers, and then we can work on travel. Fingers and toes crossed that we can have Joshua Song home for Christmas!!


I'll keep the blog updated along the way! Love to all!

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Daddy's new toy!

This past weekend, the Mongolds added another family member to the house! Yeah...it's not alive. Well....Steve talks to it, so maybe it is?

Yep....a new jeep! Or....and old - new - jeep? But new to Steve none the less!

For weeks Steve has talked about this old Jeep that was for sale by a man on his base in Georgia. I was in full support of this purchase...but I did wonder where the heck we would put it? we are kind of packed into this rental on the beach, and with a very small driveway and a garage that was only able to fit one car - at the time - the questions were obvious and real! We wanted daddy to have his toy...but could it fit in our house?

This past Saturday, with the help of Uncle Brian, the Jeep was purchased and became ours! After a full day of throwing things out, hanging hooks and shelves and organizing the garage....you will see that it ACTUALLY fit! Amazing!

I don't know what year it is, or any history on it. It is old - early 80's (old for a car...that is so young in people years right?!?!) It only goes 45 miles per hour and it sounds like a lawn mower!! But Steve is having the time of his life. He rode around with our neighbor Chris the other night and takes the kids around the block over and over. This new toy makes Steve smile from ear to ear! He just stares at it and plans all the things he will do with it!!

As for me...i am happy that Steve is happy - happy that i can still get into the garage, and happy that I have married a man this is so very simple and easy to please! Have fun daddy - we love your new toy....not as much as you love it....but we do love it!! :)



Daddy Car - baby car...
Tough men?!?!
The bumper sticker that makes me laugh out loud!
Darn thing actually fits in our garage!
Steve driving his new toy!
The kids LOVE IT!







Monday, October 6, 2008

Beautiful Mommy and Baby






Happy Birthday Kyle!!!

Kyle is 5! The biggest kid in his Pre-K class! And crazy enough....because of his age...probably the most mature kid in his class as well!! ha ha ha.

His birthday was a national holiday! It started at Disney world, then took a turn to game stop, then school....and then home to receive some REALLY great gifts in the mail! Things like LEGGO BATMAT, and a LIGHT UP DARTH VADER COSTUME and a MIX AND MATCH LIGHT SABER!! Yeah.....Kyle turning 5 was a time to remember!!

Our little guy glowed from sun up to sun down for about a full week! His smiles were so real and his Grateful heart came into full swing! He wanted to pick up the phone each time he received a gift to tell the person how happy it made him! And most time....we did just that!

Thank you to everyone that made Kyle's day so special! That means to world to him and about 100 times more to his dear Mommy!! :)

Here are some pics for his classroom party! His best Buddy Zach is sitting beside him and his other Best Buddy Will on the other side! Little Zach is about a foot shorter than Kyle and weighs at least 20 pounds less...but - at school - they are like two peas in a pod and he is a very nice little man!

And of course...we all know Kyle...his other best friends are the pretty girls with icing all over their faces! ha ha ha....Kyles little entourage!! :)

Happy 5th Kyle....we love you more than you can ever know!!